The Counselling Shed

The Belittling Effect of Comparison

January 17th, 2023

Do you ever compare yourself to your mates or colleagues and then end up thinking:

Why am I not as successful as they are?
Why am I not as popular as they are?
Why am I not as attractive as they are?
Why am I not as clever as they are?
Why am I not as sorted as they are?

Comparing ourselves to other people almost always has a belittling effect. Comparison leaves us feeling less than: not quite measuring up to the qualities or standards that we see in others.

Counselling for Low Self-Esteem

Over time this can lead us to experience low self esteem – or maybe it is our low self-esteem that goes out looking for such comparisons in the first instance.

A lot of people spend a lot of time, and money, trying to make improvements to their lives: trying to make themselves feel and appear good enough. Some people spend their whole lives doing this: climbing a ladder that will not lead them to what they ultimately need and seek.

The lasting way to feel good enough about ourselves, is not by making outer changes but by changing our internal mindset.

Can you accept yourself? Can you love and value yourself, just as you are right now? For many of us, this is not easy to do. It takes time. It takes practice and we need to try to muster a little kindness towards ourselves along the way. And sometimes, we need to reach out for a little support from those who have already travelled this path.

Counselling in East Kent

If you find it difficult to appreciate that you are already enough, then feel free to get in touch and let’s discuss how I might be able to support you.

Using a combination of counselling, image-making and therapeutic movement, I can also offer a tried and tested course of 4 sessions (with an optional 5th check-in session) to help you to move from feeling ‘not enough’, to feeling ‘pretty bloody amazing’!

If this blog resonates with you, contact me now to see how I can help you.

M: 07757 859650, E:

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