The Counselling Shed
At this time of year many people start to think about making New Years Resolutions in the hope of making a fresh start: quitting smoking, quitting chocolate, regular exercise are a few common ones.
For people who have realised that they have a problem with the compulsive watching of pornography, New Year can be a time when they re-double their efforts to quit.
There is nothing wrong with setting this as an intention in the form of a New Years Resolution. However, in my experience, as a sex and porn addiction counsellor, if the person has been using pornography for 5, 10, 15, 20+ years, then this behaviour is going to be hard-wired into the neurology of the brain.
It is definitely possible to change this wiring. It is definitely possible to recover from pornography addiction. It is possible to grow out of such habitually compulsive behaviours.
But wishful-thinking and New Years Resolutions alone, are seldom enough to make that change happen over time.
Deep, committed, continuous therapy, for a period of time – not forever – is what leads my clients, initially to a cessation in their problematic behaviours, but then, to long term lasting change over time.
I support my clients to find strategies towards creating a life that is in alignment with their values and their belief systems.
Look, if you are struggling with porn use that feels out of control, and if you are looking for change, then why not let your new years resolution be to reach out for the support that you need – and for support that actually helps. That way, you can then start to make the changes that you seek.
There are a lot of therapists and counsellors out there these days and if you are seeking help in this area, then I urge you to check that any counsellor or therapist that you are considering is properly trained. The place to look is the ATSAC website (The Association for the Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity). All counsellors on this website will have completed specialist further training so as to be able to help clients recover from sex addiction, pornography addiction and compulsive sexual behaviour disorder.
If you would like to find out how I work with my clients, then please get in touch. I don’t bite. I won’t shame you and you’ll have the focus of my time, respect and expertise, in supporting you to make the changes that you seek. You can check out my ATSAC profile here.
Why not contact me now and get the ball rolling.